Wednesday, March 14, 2012

My Body the Iceberg Lettuce

This will make little sense to those who've never compared their body to produce, but stick with me. In time I hope to make some sense. Whether it happens in this post or at some future date is up for debate...

And we're off!

After my test walk/shuffle on the treadmill of Thursday last I felt that same old discomfort in the lower right abdominal region that had me pining for the fetal position brought on by self-pity. (I've had lots of practice at that since last June, in case that wasn't clear.) My session with the massage therapist yesterday confirmed that I should, yet again, lay off anything even resembling moving forward in a bipedal fashion with anything even resembling pace for the foreseeable future. "Dangnabit!" I said to myself as the pain of the session increased with each passing minute. "Am I cursed to spend the rest of my time pursuing sedentary activities?!" I screamed with my inside (not indoor) voice (parents out there will know the difference).

Then it came to me as I ate lunch today after another brisk weight training session: my body reacts to running like iceberg lettuce reacts to caesar salad dressing (ie. not too well).

Before you ask, "What idiot would try and make caesar salad with iceberg lettuce?", allow me to defend myself. There was a container of washed and chopped up lettuce in the fridge and in my haste to get to work I grabbed it, stopping just long enough to spoon a dollop of dressing onto the contents.

Fast forward to lunchtime and after shaking that container to spread the dressing I began to enjoy my food. Low and behold, the dressing did not disperse as anticipated. With romaine lettuce the stuff does the job nicely and each leaf is covered with just the right amount of goo. But with iceberg lettuce, no such luck. Some were completely caked with dressing; others dry as *insert metaphor*.

And it hit me: my body soaks itself with exercise (leading to overuse injury) or remains dry and undernourished (leading to underuse injury). I need to find a happy medium.

Here's hoping my stupid midsection allows me to try...

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1 Comments:

Blogger Ace said...

mmm lettuce...


here's to running soon...

March 30, 2012 at 12:41 AM  

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